


A Little While Longer

by HoodieCactus



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/F, F/M, M/M, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Pining, Romantic Soulmates, Small bit of angst, Soulmates, beau and yasha are akward lesbians, everyone has two soulmates, molly is unfortunatly dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26458192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoodieCactus/pseuds/HoodieCactus
Summary: Soulmate Au!Soulmates were a tricky thing. On one hand you would have the name of your life partner, the one the gods believed was your perfect pair and equal.The other was the name of the person who would be your enemy( that definition changing depending on the person). However, no consistent nor magical way could tell you which name was which and so soulnames, as they were dubbed centuries ago, were both a gamble and a guarantee.Like everyone else, Caleb has his two tattos, but which is his lover and the other his enemy?
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett & Caleb Widogast, Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast, Fjord/Jester Lavorre, The Mighty Nein & Caleb Widogast
Comments: 2
Kudos: 163





	A Little While Longer

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic so critiques are apperciated!  
> This story was based off a Tumbler post about soulnames but I don't remeber the name. I liked the idea and ran with it. If you know the creator or are the creator , shoot a comment my way and I will give credit where it's due.

Soulmates were a tricky thing. On one hand you would have the name of your life partner, the one the gods believed was your perfect pair and equal.The other was the name of the person who would be your enemy( that definition changing depending on the person). However, no consistent nor magical way could tell you which name was which and so soulnames, as they were dubbed centuries ago, were both a gamble and a guarantee.

Bren had always believed that Astrid would be his. Afterall, her name was one of the two that graced as soon as he had turned fifteen and his soulnames had appeared on his wrist just like many of the other students at the Soltryis Academy who were his age. He believed they were meant to be, negating the possibility that the other name on his right wrist had any possibility of being his lover; no, he would rather only believe Astrid would be his future.

But time passed as the young boy matured to a man, hidden from the world in an asylum to hold him captive for finally seeing the lies that Trent Ikithon had covered in honey and sugar to bend the boy and his friends into killers obeying only his commands. That man escaped and hid beneath bandages the scars and the name he left behind. The name Astrid no longer meant love and future to him; it meant deceit and an inescapable path leading into the darkest places of the Nine Hells. 

Caleb Widogaust emerged from that prison and left Bren behind.

Caleb found himself a friend, a little goblin girl who looked past his untrimmed beard and haunted eyes that saw the man who he could be and she took him under her wing. They stole for what they needed and tricked people when the chance called for it.  
Nott had once showed him her tattoos, for even goblins have those they are destined to meet in life. One wrist read Yeza, the other Isharnai. Nott said she had only met Yeza but never elaborated. Caleb never asked her more.

Their days of thievery lead to them meeting a group of misfits like themselves all eclectic and riddled with their own pains. The whole group kept their tattooed names hidden but Caleb was always attentive when Beau would slide down her wrappings and then glance at the hulking barbarian that so often floated out of their group. Caleb always caught the way Fjord's eyes always seemed to follow after their tiefling friend and how Jester’s eyes always traced him while they kept watch. His friends were painfully obvious but Caleb kept his mouth shut and watched them with mirth and gentle melancholy.  
Nonetheless, his friends fell into place like pieces of a puzzle. Jester and Fjord found each other first after one long battle against a group of roadside bandits that had Fjord laying on the ground at the mercy of bolts that had swords. After Jester brought him back, Fjord merely showed his wrist before the two fell into each other’s arms laughing through pain and tears.

The lesbians took more time. Beau had shown her names to Caleb when he had shown her his scars and told his story but feared the woman would share the same name after she learned of Zuala worrying that she was on Yasha’s wrist instead of Beau. No matter how hard the group tried to push them together but the two women’s general awkwardness and lack of proper communication had the two stumbling around each other nervously neither wanting to reach cross a boundary that could not be fixed for the life of them. A simple night drunk had Beau throwing her wraps off to expose the names littered on her wrist, one reading Thoreau and the other Yasha making the woman surge forwards to catch her partner in her arms the two sharing a drunken kiss and never leaving each other’s arms for the rest of the night.  
Mollymauk’s tattoos were only revealed to Caleb at his death, neither names meaning anything to him even though he still memorized them after his death. Caleb only hoped Molly’s soulmate would move on and learn to love another.

Caleb never pried into Caduceus’s tattos only hoping the Wild Mother would lead her cleric to his destined partner.

Time flew by and Caleb began to think less about the names of people he was bound to and to the soulmates he had found along the way. He learned how to love again and how to feel comfortable in his own skin once more.  
Nott had asked they return to her hometown of Felderwin and the Mighty Nein discovered their little goblin was once a halfling woman whose soulmate was now within the hands of Xhorhas. The group of soulmates agreed to help their friend be reunited with her family and rushed towards Xhorhas to find him. It wasn’t till they reached Rosahna and by some happy accident offered up the beacon to The Bright Queen. Only when they were placed in the care of the Shadowhand did Caleb think of the second name now hidden only beneath sleeves.

Caleb spent the next nights tracing the name Essek Thelyss while thoughts of Astrid as his lover leaked from his mind. Tracing the name of the drow that lay on his wrist, Caleb falls asleep and for once, dreams not of flames, but of happy childhood days with his old cat and smiling mother rushing into the arms of his father and possibilities of things yet to come.

Caleb doesn’t know if Esske feels the spark between them, but Caleb craves it more than any fire spell he ever cast.

That spark seems to flicker and die when Essek reveals his treachery to the Dynasty(for a second Caleb is torn in whether Essek is the one who will be his end, and if Astrid and him are really meant to be) it rekindles when Caleb realizes the man in front of him, older by more than a century but young in the eyes of his people, is not a man destined to be eternally punished where ever his soul will go. Essek will have chances to redeem himself; he was once damned too, but Caleb hopes that all the lives he has saved may one day ellipse the ones he didn’t.

In time, the Mighty Nein find themselves in a slot of time allotted for relaxation and the group splits for a while. Jester, Fjord, and Veth head for Nicodranis: Veth to visit her family, Jester to visit her mom( and possibly unite her parents if the trickster had anything to say for it), and Fjord to enjoy the sea and the sun, possibly spending as much time with Jester as he could.

Essek whisks Caduceus off to visit his family for the time, the drow appearing back in the Xhorhouse with jars of tea tucked under his arms from the Blooming Grove. The firbolg wants to return to visit his family and see how the forest’s regrowth has been.

Yasha is called once again by the Stormlord. Beau only joins her when Caleb basically pushes her out of the city ensuring he’ll be safe with the symbol of the Bright Queen. It’s only when Essek steps up, hand placed on his shoulder ensuring he will check up on the Zeminian wizard, that Beau truly feels comfortable leaving. Caleb watches the woman he now calls his little sister leave the Xhorhouse knowing that Yasha will keep her safe and feels a calm flood his senses.

The next couple days the two wizards establish a distinct routine which the two now look forward to everyday. In the morning( or what passes as it), Caleb eats breakfast in Essek’s home the two talking about arcane properties and mechanics of dunamancy till Esske must make his way to the Bastion for his day of work and Caleb to his home to work on his own arcane theorems and spells.

When their work days draw to a close, Esske joins Caleb at the Xhorhouse for dinner, whether it be a dinner he picked up on the way, or one Caleb tried to make himself. The two talk not of the arcane, but rather of the group that is the Nein. Caleb recounts the times where Jester would pull a prank, or when Beau would awkwardly test out more of her social skills failing miserably. Essek asks all the right questions Caleb finds out, and the spark between them begins to glow even brighter.

The attraction is there, Caleb can feel it hanging in the air, but neither are sure if they want to create a pathway that could end up hurting them both more. For one thing, Caleb knows the name on his wrist is that of the Xhorhasian in front of him, but doesn’t want to tempt fate into turning one of the few things that brings him joy into something that can be twisted into a noose around his neck.  
So Caleb waits.  
And waits.  
He would rather wait then make assumptions and hurt the drow he calls a dear friend( and privately in his mind something stronger than that) or ruin the simply calming presence the two exude when together.  
Essek doesn’t need to hurry; Caleb can wait a little while longer.

However, Caleb does not expect that time to be after he is brought back from the dead.

It had been Essek’s first excursion with the Mighty Nein, more to get out of Rosohna for a spell and fight alongside his friends. They had entered deep into a tunnel system where they believed they could find a hidden relic they had been contracted to find, only to be ambushed by a cult who had the item as the center of their worship to a prince of the Nine Hells.

While the Mighty Nein was an experienced group and Essek a powerful wizard, they were slowly overwhelmed and the battle was not looking in their favor. Caleb and Essek fought side to side both shouting incantations and casting sideways glances to catch enemies coming at them. It was a whirl of magic and weapons flying in every direction and Caleb didn’t notice the rouge behind him-too occupied with the caster in front of him- before a dagger was plunged into his back.

Caleb saw black, grey, and white flash in front of his eyes as he fell to the floor. Caleb had never experienced death;the clerics usually got to him fast or he woke to a healing potion being shoved down his gullet only to get back up to cast some more. Now he felt his own body cooling, the heat leaving the soon to be corpse that was him. 

Even nearing death, Caleb still retained his perfect memory and his uncanny ability to perfectly keep time. He counted the seconds, knowing each meant the time drawing nearer to his death was close at hand.  
5 seconds.

10 seconds.

15 seconds.

20 seconds.

25 seconds.

30 seconds.

35 seconds.

40 seconds. 

45 seconds.

50 seconds.

55 sec-  
At the last possible second, Caleb felt a surge of magic surge through his body, running like thunder through his veins and into his heart to jump start the beating his body required to maintain life. The magic spread to the dagger wound and the various magical burns and bruises leaving Caleb feeling a little more put together. Groggy but not exhausted, Caleb let his eyes flutter open to meet blurs of blue, greens, greys, brown, and purple.

As Caleb’s eyes grew more into focus and his family fell on him in a series of hugs and cheer, the group began to make their way around the room looting the bodies of the fallen cultists leaving Essek to look after their squishy wizard.

Caleb had been sat up leaning on the purple man, and had very little strength to work himself into sitting on his own without aid of another of his friends. Popping Frumpkin back into his arms, Caleb decided on just letting his body rest to allow him to cast the teleportation spell to get them back to the Lucid Bastion once the Mighty Nein deemed the room clear and the group wanted to scaddle either back to the Xhorhouse or back to Nicodranis to stay the night( mostly Veth and Jester but Fjord wouldsometimes tag along to check on the Nein Heroz and Orley).

“ Well that was definitely...something.”  
Caleb turned to Essek hearing the first words from the Drow since he had been rejuvenated by the clerics. He had hung back while Veth and Jester had fussed over him, the others throwing comments at him about how he was supposed to stay alive, not die like the squishy man he was.  
“That was your first time in awhile in a fight, ja?”

Essek shifted a bit in his spot, the simpler travel clothes he’d dawned splattered lightly with blood, both from the cultists and most likely Caleb’s from when the dagger had been pulled from his body when the rogue had let his body hit the floor.  
“ My first time in a fight ever, I’m afraid,” Essek twisted slightly to position himself into less of a side-glance position and more of a “I want to talk face to face, but you just were brought back to life and I don’t want to move you too much” way. “When you are something of a politician and the Shadowhand to the Bright Queen, there’s not much way of fighting with magic. Only battling with words in court with allies on strategies and the mundane running of Xhorhas.”  
“ Well, for someone who doesn’t engage regularly in combat,” Caleb tilted his face just enough to be able to see Essek’s face. “ You sure do know how to cast in a pinch.”

Something flashed in Essek’s eyes as his cheeks darkened, going from mauve to plum, the flush spreading across his cheeks to the tips of his pointed ears like wildflowers in a springtime field.

“Ah,” Essek’s head swivel back forwards, gracing Caleb with a beautiful side profile of the drow. “ Thank you, Caleb. But I merely cast on instinct. I am not as fluid with my shifting from spell to spell as you are; It takes me more time to process the situation.”

A chuckle rumbled through Caleb’s chest as he rose a little in his spot, pecking softly at Essek’s cheek.

“You will learn in time, my friend. It’s not an art that you are incapable of learning.”

Caleb watched as the blush darkened on Essek’s face and felt his own cheeks rise with heat at his action before going to sit straight, ready for when the drow would push him off. As he went to remove his head, a small hand, comparingly to his own, softly pushed his head back onto Essek’s shoulder. Caleb found himself staring right into the eyes of Essek.They were deep blue, like the midnight sky itself had been chipped off to be put into his eyes, with little stars twinkling even here far beyond ground. Caleb hardly believed this man existed; seemingly perfect in every way and breathtaking. Gathering his resolve, he rolled back his sleeves to expose the black words inscribed on his wrist.

The name Essek Thelyss stood out sharply against pale skin lightly dusted by freckles that also themselves resembled stars, simply trapped on skin rather than encased in eyes. 

Nervously, Caleb peeked up to look at Essek wary of the Drow’s reaction. To his surprise he did not find disgust or anger. Nor felt sadness and fear. He only saw the drow’s open mouthed wonder, and the slight dusting of tears in his eyes.

“ But how? I- I don’t-” Essek was tripping over his words as he exposed his left wrist, with black ink spelling out Bren Ermendrud. “ I don't have your name how, how do you have mine?”  
Caleb reached out a hand to swipe lightly across the skin that held his name, for once not feeling any sadness or regret at the mention of his old name. He felt only happiness and so much love. 

“Because Essek, the name Bren died with me a long time ago, but I rose as Caleb in his place.”

And Caleb kissed him.

And felt happy. 

He was glad he waited a little while longer.


End file.
